Text, Drugs and Flying Bottles

I don’t like to pick holes but sitting in the crowd at The Hawthorns at the weekend it was difficult not to be disappointed with Danny Murphy’s goal celebrations. The first was a brief wave of an arm before being patted on the back by a couple of team-mates whilst the second was to kick the ball into the net for a second time, just to make sure, before briefly running in front of the Addickted with an arm aloft. Now we know why. Danny had to text the missus each time (scroll to end) to let her know he’d scored whilst no doubt reminding her at the same time not to forget the Rice Krispies and the Jammy Dodgers he’d asked for. Waitrose, I ask you (and which one please?). Can’t beat Morrisons you know. Time to text her would have been whilst waiting after the game to give a sample for drug testing, as he apparently had to do. Seriously, we really need to sort out some decent celebratory routines.

Then there’s the flying water bottle mystery. Sky’s ‘Goals on Sunday’ showed Curbs kicking a water bottle after the Thomas/Bent ‘second’ goal cock-up although the great man himself insists that this was a neat bit of trickery by Sky as he actually kicked it earlier in the game after Radi dwelt on the ball too long and needlessly gave away possession. Either way, the only water bottle I saw fly was from the boot of Dennis ‘The Increasingly Impressive’ Menace when once again becoming the sacrificial lamb that is the first substitution.

Talking of Radi/Raddo/Rady. Actually, do we have to ? Unfortunately yes we do. He seems able to perform to a certain standard for about sixty minutes before his whole game goes to pieces before your very eyes. Passes start going astray, concentration lapses and suddenly he wants ten minutes on the ball to think about what to do next. It’s as if he is whisked off to a land far away. Waitrose perhaps ? Anyone know where Mrs Kishishev shops these days ? Or is it just that he can’t text as fast as our Danny can.

Finally, whatever else transpires in January we need to make ‘Smerts’ signing permanent then, if not before. Realistically he has no real future at Chelsea but can have a fantastic future at The Valley. Tying up a permanent deal would be the best bit of business we could do.

Who's Gonna Wear Smerts Shirt ?

Not literally, of course, but exactly who will stand in for 'Deadly' in his enforced absence against Chelsea this Saturday.

The likely candidates are Bryan Hughes, Darren Ambrose, Matt Holland or, quite possibly, El Karkouri. However, there remains a question mark against each and every one of them. Firstly, Ambrose was injured for the England U-21 side last week and his fitness is uncertain. Secondly, both El Karkouri and Holland came through unscathed for the reserves this week but would both have been risked for 90 minutes if they were to feature this weekend ? Additionally, Holland is probably a few weeks off full fitness having not played yet this season and having been injured for the Republic of Ireland's match v France last week. Finally, although Bryan Hughes has performed well in a few cameo roles this season, and is a good performer from off the bench, it is unlikely that he'll be asked to start and especially against Chelsea. If fit I expect Ambrose to make his home debut alongside Kish and Murphy with El Karkouri stepping into the breech otherwise.

Elsewhere, it is hard to see where Curbs would want to change things. He may be concerned about Chris Powell up against either Robben or Wright-Phillips and the younger Jon Spector may be an option. Jerome Thomas's place could be under threat from Ambrose, if he isn't employed in central midfield, and likewise Rommedahl with whom Curbs was apparently unhappy with his (non) defensive display last week at St Andrews.

What is certain is that with a 100% record from four games played this is a game to which we can look forward with a fair degree of optimism. Chelsea also boast a 100% record and so something has to give this weekend. Whilst we are not expected to win Chelsea are and so there is no reason why we cannot go into this game with the pressure off. I expect a decent game, a few goals and both sides remaining unbeaten at 4.50pm. However, I wouldn't complain if we won !!

Finally, this Saturday will see the first visit this season to the café on the industrial estate - so see you there Rob and Di !

Play It Again Al

The trip to St Andrew's tomorrow sees Alan Curbishley spoilt for choice with regard to players available for selection, but facing no real selection dilemmas with regard the starting eleven. There is no need to change a winning formula and chances to make changes will soon come about in there own good time through injuries, suspensions or, as with Smertin next week, unavailability.

The return to fitness of El Karkouri, the availability of Sorondo after suspension and the addition of new man on the block, Jay Bothroyd, to the squad means that whom to pick as the four outfield substitutes will pose the biggest headache for AC. Myhre is a given as the substitute keeper whilst for me Spector also deserves a place both for his performances in pre-season and his versatility, covering both centre-half and left-back positions. I also expect El Karkouri to replace Fortune on the bench as he was our best centre-half last season but he cannot expect to walk back into the first team when fit if others are performing well. With Spector and El Karkouri on the bench then Sorondo will miss out completely. Bryan Hughes deserves to keep his place on the bench for a couple of reasons. He can cover across most of the midfield area and in cameo performances at both Sunderland and Boro' he provided excellent passes from which Bent duly scored on each occasion. The last place on the bench is a straight battle between Bartlett and Bothroyd and I expect Bartlett to get the nod. Not because I particularly think he is better than Bothroyd, whom I've not really seen enough of to form a decent opinion, but because he knows our game better and would probably slot in easier as a replacement for Bent.

It could be possible that another striker could replace a centre-half on the bench and although some may counternance Spector or El Karkouri starting at centre-half with Hreidersson reverting to left-back in place of Powell I really cannot see what this would achieve. Chris Powell has performed excellently so far and, as I'm sure he'd admit, at his age he is not going to be able to keep it up week-in and week-out but the time to rest him hasn't arrived yet.

I expect a very tight game at St Andrews with Charlton just nicking it by the odd goal in three.

Finally, one player definitely not featuring at St Andrews is Kevin Lisbie who has joined Norwich City on an initial one-month loan deal that could be extended by a further three months after that.

Deadline Day Dismay

So Franny Jeffers has departed to Glasgow giants, and Champions League qualifiers, Rangers on a four-month loan deal. I really hope that it works out well for him there. It certainly hasn’t gone to plan at Charlton for Franny but that is probably more to do with his (alleged) off field activities than his on field abilities. Enough said on that front, I’m sure we have all heard the stories. Either way, he wasn’t exactly suited to Curbs preferred 4-5-1 system.

Anyway, we are now definitely a striker light and I can’t see anything happening at this late stage to rectify that situation. Having not even looked at the Wigan Athletic programme I thought I’d take this opportunity, using the handbook, to assess the Charlton Athletic goal scoring records of Darren Bent’s understudies. It doesn’t make good reading.

League Only

Johansson - 89 starts (plus 55 subs) and 27 goals - a goal every 3.30 starts (5.33 incl subs)
Bartlett - 89 starts (plus 18 subs) and 23 goals - a goal every 3.87 starts (4.65 incl subs)
Lisbie - 61 starts (plus 80 subs) and 16 goals - a goal every 3.81 starts (8.81 incl subs)

Those for Lisbie, in my opinion, are especially poor. These have come over a nine season period in which the games he actually started read 4,1,0,0,5,10,24,5 and, last season, 12. His highest tally in a season was 5 when he started just 10 games but the next season he started 24 but scored only 4. JJ’s goals per games he has started is pretty good at just over three but both Bartlett and Lisbie are approaching four and when you take into account sub appearances then the record of all three is very poor but especially Lisbie whose is close to a goal every nine games. Considering strikers are normally brought on to change a game by scoring a goal then the record of each of our ’strikers’ is extremely poor. Its okay to offer as an excuse other attributes that each of the above has but at the end of the day strikers are judged on the goals they score and nothing else. As a comparison the much maligned Carl Leaburn had, sub appearances included, a strike rate of a goal every 6.08 games, far better than that of Lisbie and not significantly worse than those of Johansson and, to a lesser extent, Bartlett.

At the other end of the scale Clive Mendonca’s record reads a goal every 2.1 games and Derek Hales a goal every 2.16 games. These are the strikes rate we expect of a striker and frankly our current bunch, Dazza excepted, do not cut the mustard.

All of which is very much a cause for concern. Should Bent be missing for whatever reason then we have a real problem. Not only can the striker with the best record when starting, Johansson, not play the lone front man role but the two who can, Bartlett and Lisbie, have records that even Showaddywaddy would be ashamed of (if you are too young ask your parents).
I suppose that we will have to just trust that Curbs knows what he is doing but letting Franny out on loan could backfire on us big-time.

Late breaking news even as I finish writing this is that Charlton have signed striker Jay Bothroyd. Aged just 23 he started his career at Arsenal before moving on to Coventry City and then Perugia. The second half of last season was spent on loan at Blackburn Rovers. His goal scoring record is hardly impressive but at six foot three he is ideally suited to the one up front system and seeing as he has been rumoured to have been on trial at Sparrows Lane for the past week or two we can only assume that Alan Curbishley has seen something in him that he likes. It remains to be seen as to whether this is a loan deal or a permanent transfer.